Empty your mind;Be Formless…

I think while many people view online flirting as harmless since there is no touching of the other person there is still great danger emotionally. The most important facets include blurring of male and female identities, cocktails of fact and fantasy, sharp disjunctions and free associations in thoughts, and the fluid assumption of new personas, all aided and abetted by hyper fast communication in the absence of verbal and visual cues to behavior. If the cybersex trial tells us anything, it is that in the free-wheeling interplay of these elements, which it encourages, cyber culture has turned yesterday’s pathology into today’s ordinary sex chat. The Internet definitely has its charms. But unless there is a better understanding of how it is changing the dynamics of social life, there may well be a lot more court in modem courtship.

Since is not my field there is part of the latest and most serious EXPLORATORY STUDY ABOUT THE IMPACTS THAT CYBERSEX IS HAVING (Peter D. Goldberg Karen Rosen, Ed. D., Chairperson) I was given:

“CHAPTER 1: INTRODUCTION The Problem and Its Setting Since 1994 the Internet experienced a surge in growth as it became widely available to private commerce, and to the general public (Kristula, 2001). That year there were 38 million internet users worldwide, and by September of 2002 the number grew to 606 million users;approximately 30%, or 183 million, were from the United States and Canada (Nua, 2003). During these past 10 years, what is communicated, how it is communicated, where communications originate and terminate, can all be directed and controlled from personal computers, cell phones, or hand-held organizers. E-mail, chat rooms, streaming-video technologies, live video, music, radio, auctions, e-commerce are all communicated via the Internet at a minimal cost from the privacy of our homes, hotels, offices, and cars. Sex has been reported to be the most popular search topic on the Internet (Nua Internet Surveys, 2001). Leone and Beilsmith (1999) reported that 31% of the people on-line visited an adult-content web site. Cooper, Delmonico, & Burg (2000) surveyed 9,265 Cybersex users and categorized this population into four groups: 83% were non-sexually compulsive, recreational users, who did not exhibit problematic behaviors; 11% were moderately sexually compulsive;5% were sexually compulsive; and 1% were Cybersex compulsive. The study identified a category of “at-risk” Cybersex users as those who may never have accessed pornographic material were it not for the privacy and availability of the Internet. The California Marital and Sexuality Center identify 6.5% of those accessing Cybersex sites as exhibiting compulsive behaviors, and an additional 17% have been described as “at risk” of becoming sexually addicted (Cooper, Delmonico, & Burg, 2000). Based on these estimates, as many as 47 million people are 2 viewing Cybersex, and as many as 9.6 million may be experiencing problems with controlling their behaviors with Cybersex. The access to sexual material by either the recreational users or those experiencing compulsive pathology affects their partners and immediate families (Young, 2001). Nonsexual compulsive (including educational/research purposes) use may be misunderstood by partners or sexually explicit material may be inadvertently left on computers and later accessed by children; compulsive users negatively affect their partners in a variety of ways as I explain later in the study. The Internet is challenging the very definitions of terms such as infidelity,sexuality, pornography, and intimacy. Is a sexually explicit chat on the Internet an affair? What are the long term repercussions of accidentally leaving a pornographic picture on a computer monitor that can be viewed by a 7 year old child? What are the impacts on a couple’s sexual expression when a partner finds that a sexual fantasy that would otherwise have been naturally extinguished is now strongly reinforced on the Internet? Through the Internet, pornography, sexually explicit material, and sexually focused communication (Cybersex) is now available to every household that is connected to the World Wide Web. The spouses, the children, the siblings, and the extended circle of relationships of those accessing Cybersex are at risk of finding themselves swept up in a wake of consequences brought on by this contemporary form of sexual expression. There exist several studies performed by addiction specialists on the characteristics and usage patterns of Cybersex addicts (Cooper et al., 2000), and on the reported effects of Cybersex use on their partners (Schneider, 2000). However, there exist no studies that tell us how Cybersex problems are presenting in the offices of marriage and family therapists. This exploratory study looks at the experience of marriage and family therapists with clients coming for therapy presenting conflicts around Cybersex us “The Problem and Its Setting Since 1994 the Internet experienced a surge in growth as it became widely available to private commerce, and to the general public (Kristula, 2001). That year there were 38 million internet users worldwide, and by September of 2002 the number grew to 606 million users; approximately 30%, or 183 million, were from the United States and Canada (Nua, 2003). During these past 10 years, what is communicated, how it is communicated, where communications originate and terminate, can all be directed and controlled from personal computers, cell phones, or hand-held organizers. E-mail, chat rooms, streaming-video technologies, live video, music, radio, auctions, e-commerce are all communicated via the Internet at a minimal cost from the privacy of our homes, hotels, offices, and cars. Sex has been reported to be the most popular search topic on the Internet (Nua Internet Surveys, 2001). Leone and Beilsmith (1999) reported that 31% of the people on-line visited an adult-content web site. Cooper, Delmonico, & Burg (2000) surveyed 9,265 Cybersex users and categorized this population into four groups: 83% were non-sexually compulsive, recreational users, who did not exhibit problematic behaviors; 11% were moderately sexually compulsive; 5% were sexually compulsive; and 1% were Cybersex compulsive. The study identified a category of “at-risk” Cybersex users as those who may never have accessed pornographic material were it not for the privacy and availability of the Internet. The California Marital and Sexuality Center identify 6.5% of those accessing Cybersex sites as exhibiting compulsive behaviors, and an additional 17% have been described as “at risk” of becoming sexually addicted (Cooper, Delmonico, & Burg, 2000). Based on these estimates, as many as 47 million people are viewing Cybersex, and as many as 9.6 million may be experiencing problems with controlling their behaviors with Cybersex. The access to sexual material by either the recreational users or those experiencing compulsive pathology affects their partners and immediate families (Young, 2001). Nonsexually compulsive (including educational/research purposes) use may be misunderstood by partners or sexually explicit material may be inadvertently left on computers and later accessed by children; compulsive users negatively affect their partners in a variety of ways as I explain later in the study. The Internet is challenging the very definitions of terms such as infidelity, sexuality, pornography, and intimacy. Is a sexually explicit chat on the Internet an affair? What are the long term repercussions of accidentally leaving a pornographic picture on a computer monitor that can be viewed by a 7 year old child? What are the impacts on a couple’s sexual expression when a partner finds that a sexual fantasy that would otherwise have been naturally extinguished is now strongly reinforced on the Internet? Through the Internet, pornography, sexually explicit material, and sexually focused communication (Cybersex) is now available to every household that is connected to the World Wide Web. The spouses, the children, the siblings, and the extended circle of relationships of those accessing Cybersex are at risk of finding themselves swept up in a wake of consequences brought on by this contemporary form of sexual expression. There exist several studies performed by addiction specialists on the characteristics and usage patterns of Cybersex addicts (Cooper et al., 2000), and on the reported effects of Cybersex use on their partners (Schneider, 2000). However, there exist no studies that tell us how Cybersex problems are presenting in the offices of marriage and family therapists. This exploratory study looks at the experience of marriage and family therapists with clients coming for therapy presenting conflicts around Cybersex use.”

P.C. Anyone interested in the full material please leave me your email and I will send it to you by PDF file)

Mariah Carey-We belong together

(Ooh,ooh,ooh, sweet love, yeah)

I didn’t mean it When I said I didn’t love you, so I should have held on tight I never should’ve let you go I didn’t know nothing I was stupid, I was foolish I was lying to myself I could not fathom that I would ever Be without your love Never imagined I’d be Sitting here beside myself Cause I didn’t know you Cause I didn’t know me But I thought I knew everything I never felt

The feeling that I’m feeling Now that I don’t hear your voice Or have your touch and kiss your lips Cause I don’t have a choice Oh, what I wouldn’t give To have you lying by my side Right here, cause baby (We belong together)

When you left I lost a part of me It’s still so hard to believe Come back baby, please Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon’ lean on When times get rough Who’s gonna talk to me on the phone Till the sun comes up Who’s gonna take your place There ain’t nobody better Oh, baby baby, we belong together

I can’t sleep at night When you are on my mind Bobby Womack’s on the radio saying to me “If you think you’re lonely now” Wait a minute This is too deep (too deep) I gotta change the station So I turn the dial Trying to catch a break And then I hear Babyface I only think of you And it’s breaking my heart I’m trying to keep it together But I’m falling apart

I’m feeling all out of my element throwing things, crying Trying to figure out Where the hell I went wrong The pain reflected in this song ain’t even half of what I’m feeling inside I need you Need you back in my life, baby

When you left I lost a part of me It’s still so hard to believe Come back baby, please Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon’ lean on When times get rough Who’s gonna talk to me on the phone Till the sun comes up Who’s gonna take your place There ain’t nobody better Oh, baby baby, we belong together, baby

When you left I lost a part of me It’s still so hard to believe Come back baby, please Cause we belong together

4erupkova sum.Az ne su6testvuvam-in fakt nikoi ne su6testvuva v moiat sviat sega. That one alludes to the fact that in a confrontation, you cannot think about what to do next…you must feel it. If you think about it, you’re done before you begin.

“Analysis Error Caused By A Device Driver A device driver installed on your system caused the problem; however, we cannot determine the precise cause.” M,da pak 6te si igraia: )no sega liagam.

Igrah si to4no 65min(exploring blog’s security vulnerability)no si vurnah blog-a .Samo deto ne be6e po na4ina po koito bi triabvalo da prote4e edin log on(it’s nothing to be proud of .Informaciata 6te zapazia za sebe si poradi eventualna zloupotreba s neia.No uspiah da se razpi6a za dnes-to4no 3 min predi 12.00:)

In the words of Freud paraphrased: “Therapy is to turn neurotic conflicts into normal problems”; Jung: “The point of therapy is to lead a normally disillusioned life” and Woody Allen: “Life is full of misery, loneliness, unhappiness and suffering and it’s all over much too quickly.

Biv6 kolega me vze tazi sutrin-imahme ugovorka za morska nedelia.Deniat mina neusetno.Be6e morsko,hubavo i spokoino.Provedohme dosta razgovori,no “pluvahme” predimno v dulboki vodi… Leka no6t.

Nai nakraia otnovo da se sre6tna s moia priatel Richard, biahme se organizirali(po-skoro toi o4akva6e tova party s neturpenie i suotvetno organizaciata be6e izcialo negova).Izpolzva slu4eiat da me zapoznae s noviat si boyfriend(za koito sme imali mnogobroini telefonni diskusii:))i koito namerih intiligentno i izklu4itelno zabavno su6testvo.Vremeto be6e to4no podhodia6toto za otkrito party.Ima6e pone 30 000 prisustva6ti-zabavlenieto be6e neopisuemo. Kato za nai-golemiat muzikalen festival po roda si predstavianeto i organizaciata biaha na mnogo visoko nivo(12 stages and tents, jacuzzis, swimming pools, a beach island, foam party).Ubedila sum se,4e gay partytata sa bili vinagi izklu4itelno izpipani,no tova nadmina dori i moite o4akvania.Ima6e nai-stranniat sbor ot muzikanti-League, The Cuban Brothers, Felix Da Housecat,The Wurzels, Bananarama, Peter Andre,Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Girls Aloud, McFly, Natasha Bedingfield,Fun Lovin’ Criminals…(mainstream pop,dance, soul and hip hop).Dokolkoto razbrah subranite pari4ni sredstva 6te sa za Stonewall( the gay rights charity)a samoto subitie sponsorirano ot “Faceparty”-izvestni s kampaniite si za sexual freedom and equality po celiat sviat.Nai-goliamo vpe4etlenie mi napravi “Fairytale Wonderland” scenata s hiliadi specialno dokarani rainforest durveta i s krasivite zamuci-suzdava6e mi use6taneto za fantasy world.Vzirah se v krasotata na mnogobroinite kostumi-niama6e takuv vizira6t”Beauty and the Beast”.Minalata godina go propusnah,no iskreno se radvam,4e tazi uspiah:) Su4etanieto na dulga i o4akvana sre6ta s dobur priatel,koito se 6eguva6e”straight people are welcome” napravi party-to o6te po-priatno:)Liagam..no zaspivam ot sladka umora:) I had incredible time.

Just up. Just drinking coffee. Just reading my letters. Just had a call from friend. Just reading my email. Just noticing my session documents are messed up Just had a g-line. Just running late for a meeting. Just out of the door.

Uporito misleh za poslednata sesia i siaku6 usetih podsuznatelnoto si jelalnie da spra mislite. Zavih po most4eto do vku6ti naslajdavaiki se na 4urulikaneto na pti4kite i hubaviat petuk(haresvam petucite) i kakvo da vidia-dve jeni si beriaha kupini ot mnogobroinite kupineni hrasti do gori4kata.Ednata durje6e kupi4ka,a drugata plik4e.Napomni mi za diado mi,koito vinagi kogato go pose6tavah me razhojda6e po gorite mi razkazva6e za vidovete gubi,hrasti..ect.Ve4e ne bi mogul da izdurji na dulgi razhodki…onzi den,kogato mu se obadih usetih tujnata notka v glasa mu promulviavaiki”dovijdane”(ne mislia,4e toi razbra,4e az razbrah). Ne znam koe e po-dobroto v slu4eiat-da znae kakvo vsu6tnost e zaboliavaneto mu ili da ne znae…spored men znae,no ne pokazva,4e znae za6toto ne e siguren dokolko az znam.Udivitelen 4ovek-obi4am go. I mislite biaha spriali.Sega puk ostava vuprosut koia e spirkata….

Be6e zasterlian man(five shots) tried to blow himself up na Stockwell Tube station ostaviaiki sak s bomba sled sebe si dori.Vupreki evakuaciata niama6e jertvi poradi navremennata reakcia na policiata. Otvoriha Viktoria line dnes,no Stockwell, Oval and Warren Street vse o6te sa zatvoreni,koeto se otraziava na trafika makar,4e niakoi hora izbirat koleloto kato sredstvo za predvijvane.